Third World Voters

Politicians who are tired of being carped at by conservatives may want to consider running for office in a third world country. You won’t be able to bilk $millions from special interest groups, but you will be able to get votes if you don’t mind adapting your campaign strategy to include stealing food and having your gestapo terrorize opponents.

To get started, you need to meet all the criminal gangs running the country you are interested in and convince them that “you’re their guy”.  You will need to be able to control the flow of food being donated to your starving population and ensure that it is distributed selectively. You will need to join the cabal of criminals and become a partner in crime. 

American politicians are already qualified to “go along to get along”, so they will fit in nicely.

Third world voters exist in two groups. A small minority of these voters are partners in the criminal organization you want to run. Some are partners who are running their own organizations, but need you to “go along” with whatever scam they are perpetrating. These include drug cartels, international criminals, financial maggots and corrupt officials.  You job would be to ensure that government officials remain corrupt.

The vast majority or regular folks are starving and will do whatever it takes to keep getting handouts of cash and food in exchange for their compliance with your brutality. They live in hovels in rural areas, plant their own crops and raise their own animals, plant and harvest coca and process it into cocaine to sell to the drug cartel guy. This allows them to feed their families to keep them from starving. They will vote to keep you in charge of government corruption if you leave them alone.

We need to make sure the US doesn’t end up like Venezuela.

Norb Leahy, Dunwoody GA Tea Party Leader